So often we focus on the problem we have at hand, we obsess over why it happened. We complain, we vent, we get it off our chest. I do this so often without even thinking. All of this can be healthy and productive IF we don’t stay in the problem. We have to move towards finding a solution, shifting to becoming solution oriented.
Let’s be honest, this is just as much a reminder for you as it for me! I’m in it with you! I even pride myself on being a “financial solutions expert.” While I’m great with numbers and finances, oftentimes I struggle with the mental shifts. So of course, since I’m a content consumer and lover of learning, I dove into how to shift my mindset to become more solution oriented. Here are a few things I’ve learned.
Get Ready to Shift
Well obviously, haha! For the longest time, I refused to recognize that I was part of the problem. I complained, vented, wanted to be justified in my angry feelings, never wanting to move past it. Searching for change, I had to do some work to realize I don’t want to continue like this, I needed solutions. I focused on my desire to be happy more than my desire to be justified. While I know that things happen, I don’t want to be known as the constant complainer.
Pay attention to the underlying issue – dig into it. Sometimes we take situations at surface level and never dig in. Say your co-worker was late to a meeting or cancelled at the last minute and you’re frustrated. Well sure, it is extremely frustrating to be on the receiving end of that. You’ve reserved your time for something and now have to suddenly change or reschedule. One thing I’ve learned about this situation, in particular, is effective communication and boundary setting. Both are things I struggle with. Dig into it and look for opportunities to find a solution.
Become Aware of Your Surroundings
Take inventory of the people and environments you’re surrounded with on a regular basis.
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.Jim Rohn
Especially now, in the midst of a world wide pandemic, you might be thinking, well I’m surrounded by my spouse and kids, sooo what now. Think about what books are you reading, what shows are you watching, what podcasts are you listening to. All of that contributes to your environment and what is going into your mind.
When you put productive, growth oriented content into your head, your mindset slowly begins to follow the path towards productivity, growth, solutions. Often I’ll be listening to a book or podcast and the host or author will say something about my situation and I’ll have an ahh-haa moment! Like wow, I should definitely try that, I bet that would help.
Change a Few Key Words
Sarah, founder of the We Spot, has talked about using different words and replacing thoughts. Changing words can be one tool in your solution toolbox. Two of my favorite substitutions are: “and” instead of “but” and “get to” instead of “have to“.
I am frustrated with this conflict and I’m working to find a solution.
I get to do this work with my client.
For me, when I intentionally make those word substitutions, not only am I shifting my mindset, I’m smiling (even if it’s on the inside) because I’m thinking of my friend.
Invest in Your Mindset
Investing in your mindset and yourself can be done in so many ways. Here are a few below:
-Get an accountability partner and discuss your goals
-Join a virtual (or in-person) group that focuses on growth and solutions
-Get a coach/mentor to help guide you
-Take a workshop
-Follow growth leaders on social media
-Talk to a counselor or therapist
Give yourself credit for coming this far, you’re worth it. Take the time to dig into yourself. Inside is where the solutions lie. Happy digging! <3