Raised Free-Spirited: What is Religious Trauma?
As a child raised by two pastor kids, I've always said that I was raised free-spirited. Meaning that yes, I was encouraged to never limit my soul, but also that…
As a child raised by two pastor kids, I've always said that I was raised free-spirited. Meaning that yes, I was encouraged to never limit my soul, but also that…
Anxiety can be common and something that many people experience. So if you’re feeling anxious and stressed out, you’re not alone. Millions of people experience some form of anxiety on…
My daughter’s birthday is in November. As any mom, I get excited as her birthday gets near. But for me, her birthday is a time when celebration and grief collide.…
The number of years I’ve spent hating my body is a sad testament to the times we live in. Practically from birth, we’re bombarded with messages that we’re supposed to…
On Saturday, I did the quintessential single-mom thing – I learned to mow my own lawn. I had put this off for a while. Why? Learned helplessness. Of course, I…
**First and foremost I need to issue a trigger warning for this blog. I’ll be discussing domestic violence and verbal and emotional abuse. If you or someone you know is…
Please be aware that this article discusses bulimia. If you or someone you know struggles with an eating disorder, please call the National Eating Disorders Association Helpline: 1-800-931-2237, or text “NEDA”…
I wish I could afford to buy organic produce. Dealing with chronic fatigue and digestive issues while living in a trailer park and mothering a toddler and a four-year-old, I…
Despite my best efforts, I managed to traumatize my child. The reason I can joke about it is that my “child” is 23 years old. A while back, I was…
Let's take a trip into how to have a great day and a wonderful week. Life can be unpredictable. Sometimes, you wake up not feeling good, it's a struggle to…
We practice stealing from ourselves and others all the time. We steal from our futures, our growth, and our ability to take what we want to be the person we…
We were in the desert, but the concept of forest bathing was not on our radar, let alone desert bathing. What life lessons would we encounter while surrounded by nature?…
We are all magical beings by nature and manifesting a magical life you want is possible for you. As a mama of three, author, a small business owner and everything…
My whole life was spent doubting myself in every way. I didn't trust myself at all. I didn’t make any decisions without running them by a handful of people first,…
The Japanese have a philosophy of three faces. It's the idea that we are not the same person at all time. We show different parts of ourselves to different people.…
How often do you make self care a priority? If you are the average person, probably not very often. In this chaotic, high tech, fast paced world we live in,…
We are in an age when people are throwing around mental diagnoses like they're candy in a parade. Narcissism has been a word batted around a lot in popular culture.…
Before I begin my journey into meditation, I will provide a definition and science-based information. Oxford’s Dictionary defines meditation: as the practice of focusing your mind in silence; as well…
It happens all the time. Someone says or does something offensive and you're left feeling hurt and angry. We have a natural tendency to fight back, to seek revenge, to…
Can you spot what’s wrong with my chandelier? Yep, it’s missing a lightbulb. Do you ever feel like you're something gorgeous that’s just missing a lightbulb moment? Projects in progress make me…
Most people have an idea of what forgiveness is, but have you ever considered what forgiveness is not? Maybe it's not what you think it is. Let’s take a few…
I’ve been feeling fragile and uneasy lately. With so much going on in the world, and in my personal life, it’s been a challenge to find peace. I know that…
Because this is my first blog post with The We Spot, I wanted to introduce myself. But I’m not talking about your run-of-the-mill intro. I want to introduce myself in…
Insight into the Ho'oponopono Technique First, I'd like to tell you about the benefits of using the Ho'oponopono technique and how it started. Ho'oponopono is an ancient Hawai'ian practice; that helps heal and…
Do you tend to evaluate your worth in terms of your performance or achievements? Beat yourself up whenever you make the smallest mistake? Find it hard to relax and accept…
Celebrating my 39th year feels so ho hum. Is this a result of pandemic blues or is it really all downhill after 40? I polled my peers, my elders, and…
What the Heck is Intuitive Eating Anyway? As an Intuitive Eating Counselor and Coach, I get this question a lot. I’ve written a couple of other articles about Intuitive…
Winter completely kicked my ass. For whatever reason, once it’s dark, I’m done. The literal and figurative darkness of the season was exhausting. Even when there was inspiring weather, something…
There was a time in which I felt really lost. When I didn’t know which direction to turn. When I wasn’t sure which way was up and which way was…
I Drove to the Store with My Heart Breaking... because I didn’t know what else to do. I’d learned in my support group for spouses of addicts that when my…
In a world where we see many injustices, inequities, and despair. A world that at times feels heavy, out of control, and out of hand. When at times it seems…
Are you an empath? Do you struggle with flying emotions and negative energy? Feelings and emotions are intense and everywhere, that is why I am here sharing these 7 survival…
Let me as you a question. But before I do, prepare yourself to give an honest answer. Not one you “think” you should say. But a REAL answer. Ready? How…
Why is music so ingrained in our teens, in all of us humans? Why does it transport us to a certain place and time? My teen years are a soundtrack…
Speaking my truth, I'm a GenX'er and that comes with many things I'm proud of. We didn't get trophies much but the ribbons I earned from track are cherished memories.…
We hear moms say it all the time… “I had children and I lost myself”. I get it. I’ve seen so many women in therapy who feel this exact same…
Advice once given: Saying it is hard is making it harder. And I agreed that actually calling something hard could make it feel harder and create a negative perspective. And…
Have you ever felt stuck? Like you are ready to step into a new chapter of your life, but you still feel stagnant? It is frustrating when you can feel…
“Grace is a power that comes in and transforms a moment into something better.” Caroline Myss 2021 began with much uncertainty due to the ongoing pandemic. Somehow, I (and I'm…
The lies of marriage make it difficult to have a "happy" or "thriving marriage, the truth is we grow together and apart. Here I am learning how to let go…
Self sabotage showed up big in 2020 for many of us. Food and alcohol and all the other things we tend to "over" do are quick easy soothers for hard…
"If you look at what you have in life, you will always have enough. If you look at what you don't have in life, you'll never have enough." Oprah Winfrey.…
Do you struggle with anxiety-induced control? Are there times where you feel like a control freak when things don't go your way? Is controlling anything you can, a coping mechanism…
When we deny the story, it defines us. When we own the story we can write a brave new ending. Brené Brown Why is healing so hard? If you have…
Every body is different. And yet I know I'm not alone in having this image of how my body should look. For years I've worked to love my body. For…
Trigger warning! Please be aware that this article discusses suicide, self harm, and cutting. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at…
"Where there is no gardener there is no garden." -Wolfgang von Goethe . This quote reminds me of a conversation that my grandfather and I had after we lost my…
I sat on the couch watching my daughter play with her toys; my eyes starting to fill with tears. Feeling overwhelmed and beating myself up for how the day had…
I'm sure you've heard the saying, "the past is a lesson, not a prison" or something close to that. Dang, why did it take me fortysomething years to figure this…
My favorite season is here, welcome Fall! The trees are beginning to transition and it's time to acknowledge a similar change within ourselves. The changing seasons can be a guide…
You must build yourself up if you are going to live the life you desire and find the joy you deserve. No matter the strength and number of your relationships…
Successful women surround me and it's so incredibly beautiful until I get a knot in my stomach. It happens slowly, but then quickly. Spite blurs my vision and creates lies…
I have been utilizing the mental health system since I was 10 years old. It was at that age that I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and Major Anxiety…
"Being human is hard not because you're doing it wrong, it's hard because your doing it right." Glennon Doyle, Untamed How can we set boundaries in our relationships and especially…
Navigating the loss of my dad a mere five years after the loss of my mom . . . there are no words. The strong desire to push eject from…
We recently flew to Minnesota and being a family of four we had one row with the girls and me, then my husband across the aisle. A seemingly nice woman…
Charity is defined by giving money to an organization that helps those in need. And it's true, money does help. Our amazing network of nonprofits within our nation depend on…
To the mom parenting without a village, I see you. I want you to know, I long for that close circle of support too. My husband and I are raising…
Guilt says you made a mistake. Shames says you are the mistake. Guilt motivates. Shame annihilates. -Susie Garlick Do members of your family bring instant guilt and shame? Specific members…
This past year has been heavy. Ok let's be honest, for many of us, it has just plain sucked! The pandemic, social unrest, dehumanization, political division, virtual school, it has…
If you’re anything like me, the title of this article may have scared you away. Losing religion? Finding faith? Yikes. Religion can be a touchy subject; delicate at best, offensive…
I often have people tell me, “You are superwoman. I don’t know how you do it all.” The reality is, I am not superwoman, I'm anxious. The truth of it is…
Any type of mess makes me anxious. If my house is messy-even if I do not have the energy to do anything about it-it gives me physical anxiety. I start…
A year ago I went to my 40-week prenatal appointment alone, masked following pandemic protocols, but looking forward to the ultrasound to get to see my baby. I was not…
To be clear, I am not a historian, or an expert in African American history or culture. I am a white woman and only learned of Juneteenth during my own…
Healing is in layers, healing is time. Healing is excruciating. Once you think it's done, it's not. Mary Demuth Father, dad, daddy, those names can bring a boil to my…
Please be aware that this article discusses suicide, rape, and abuse. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, text HOME…
How do we view our friends and are our friendships? Healthy or toxic? Have you found yourself arguing with your friends after they've disagreed with you? Do you see your…
I stand looking in the mirror. I am unmasked and starting the journey of unbecoming. It starts again though. I hear her breathing and speaking her bullshit behind my back.…
Someone steps on my foot and I yell "ouch." The usual response from an empathetic person is, "I'm so sorry I stepped on your foot. "Are you okay? I wasn't…
Our world is hurting right now. And I don’t mean just with everything with COVID the past year. We have been hurting for a while. One of the concerns that…
Admittedly, I’m lacking confidence as a parent at the end of this school year. Yes, school during a pandemic has been more than just confidence-shaking. But for me it has…
I write a lot about how the beauty of giving is a gift itself, literally and figuratively. What about boundaries or cut-off points to your extended hand? If you do,…
What does maternal exhaustion mean? Well, I knew that I needed to face this topic for the last six months. Instead of writing, maternal exhaustion has been where I’ve lived.…
Mental health is a huge concern in our world today. Despite some advances, there is still a large stigma around mental health; especially around getting treatment. According to the National…
I’m cuddled up under one of my grandma’s blankets. A Mendoza painting of hers is now hanging in my entryway, a statement piece I’d overlooked countless times when it hung…
Facing my emotions has never been easy for me, but the fear of change I would have to say is one of the worst. I don't like to sit with…
Hello there and greetings to all who read this article. I hope and pray that everyone is doing well. That is indeed my hope for you. This article was going…
We all have something and sometimes we are buried in our something, running from sobriety. Your something might be grief. It might be alcohol or binge eating. Maybe it is…
Our dog died and I had no idea I’d feel so sad. I knew my kids would be sad to lose our pet, but I really didn’t expect to be.…
Change is inevitable and the only thing that is constant throughout our lives. The world is always shifting and changing, even when we are not aware. I have a complicated…
I used to say it all the time. "I am a recovering perfectionist." What I really meant was more along the lines of, "Yeah, yeah, I know it's a bad…
I’ve been out of school for quite a while now. I’m considerably older than you must have been when I was in your class, but still depend daily on lessons…
My first birthday after losing my mom, I asked my husband for a unique birthday present. A punching bag. There was so much emotion that had built up inside of…
March is Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) Month. My TBI story begins on a perfectly beautiful, bluebird-sky day in early February 2013. While driving my son's acting friends to their drama…
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and the symptoms that spark from it can feel defeating. Overwhelming. All consuming. Some days it takes everything out of you. I have Complex Post-Traumatic Stress…
I was 20 when I lost my first pregnancy. I felt betrayed by my body, but at that point in my life, betrayal was all I knew towards her. My…
For women with a known chance of a high-risk pregnancy, finding out you’re expecting can be a terrifying experience. I am one of those women. It's difficult to share such…
Due to a series of unexpected events at the beginning of the year, I had the opportunity to spend 5 days of extreme self-care by myself at the beach. I'd…
Filled with a sense of indifference, I sat and watched as the young sapling's leaves rustled in the light breeze. Its small trunk swayed gently as the wind swirled around it.…
COVID has changed most of our lives in one way or another. It changed our world in what seemed as though overnight. I know that there has been so much…
The inherent risk in tackling this topic is that you think I’m crazy, but I hope you think I’m brave. Anything less than bravery could not have brought me here,…
The Blessing of Bonus Littles I’ve been blessed to be the auntie of two of the most loving, creative, kind, and unique kiddos (sure, I’m a little biased). My niece…
Warning: traumatic birth story detailed below. Please read on with caution as the material or descriptions may be triggering. Every January, as his birthday draws near, I have a tightness…
A couple weeks ago I was out shopping with my daughter. We saw this awesome shirt (pictured) in the store Zumiez. I posted it on my story on both my…
The wintery days are upon on us, and we are very likely still somewhat limited in where we can go and what we can do, due to the pandemic. So,…
Toxic positivity is a mindset that I am very familiar with. For years, perfectionism and toxic positivity plagued my thoughts and inner world. This way of thinking affected how I…
How do you know when it’s time to move on? Or to say no to something that you’ve previously said yes to? Are you a “Yes” Person? If you find…
This past summer has been a summer of growing pains. I have outgrown people and things, but more specifically, I have outgrown things that leave my soul heavy. This…
Empathy, forgiveness, and hope are gifts we can give all year long. Empathy Before I started my personal development journey, I wondered what the true difference between empathy and sympathy…
If you’ve been following me for even a short time, you probably know that I am passionate about Intuitive Eating. It is my absolute delight to help my clients free…
So, What did you accomplish in 2020? Yeah, we get it, it’s the end of the year and we are supposed to be gearing up for happy holidays and…
Do you find it difficult and are hesitant to ask for and accept help when you are in need? Why do some of us hesitate when it comes to asking…
How to educate has entered pretty much every parent’s home this year in a new way. As I write this I am embracing our third month of facilitating online kindergarten…
Forgiveness, there would be no chance of it. I had danced with the devil, there would be no second chances. I can remember the morning just like it was yesterday.…
Veterans Day is always a day of great reflection for me. Growing up the daughter of a Vietnam Veteran and then later marrying a Veteran from Operation Enduring Freedom, I…
Have you ever read a Choose Your Own Adventure book? These stories allow the reader to assume the role of the protagonist and make choices to determine the main character's…
If you are a college student, or are a parent of a college student, then you are well aware that online classes have started and are kicking into high gear.…
I set out on a journey about 3 years ago. A journey of stabilization and healing. At the beginning, there was desire to heal and get better but there was…
Have you ever tried to follow an “expert’s” advice that just didn’t fit for you? Have you felt like a failure because their advice didn’t work as well for you…
It's been a long journey living with depression and anxiety for 30+ years. I remember with great and vivid detail my very first panic attack. I spent years trying to…
Many of us are never taught to feel what we feel. Instead, we're trained to ignore our emotions, to stifle them. We label them as "good" or "bad," celebrating the…
Being a caregiver can be very challenging and sometimes difficult to overcome but it can be done. On January 31, 2017, the rest of mine and my mother's lives changed…
I am once again reminded that there is beauty in the every day moments as I watch the sunrise while holding our 8 week old. It is the ordinary, every…
My bookshelves are full of titles like “Present Over Perfect,” “The Way of the Happy Woman,” “The Happiness Project,” and “Rising Strong.” I’ve read and loved them all. Most are…
When I try to imagine what it’s like to have Alzheimer’s disease, the most common cause of dementia, I think of the flower that represents the cause — Forget-Me-Nots. Though…
I could throw statistics at you all day about the number of people who have thought about, attempted, and died from suicide within the last year. But tell me this,…
I lost a friend to cancer over a week ago. Yesterday was the first time I was able to even speak about her with my husband because I couldn't talk…
We know the day we’re born, but not when we'll die. One bookend of our lives is defined but not the other. In our younger decades we anxiously race toward…
Most people do not feel at peace in the present moment. They are uncomfortable with themselves, unable to be alone with their own thoughts. Think about it. How long has…
Are you someone who is sensitive? If you are, do you sometimes ask yourself or just question, "Why am I so sensitive?" I have many times throughout my life, so…
It is 3:42 in the morning and I can feel her warrior heart beating against mine. I am exhausted and my body aches. It’s been less than 24 hours since…
In the glow of the morning light is, ironically, when I feel the heaviest. When I wake up, I admire the sun seeping through the cracks of my curtains, spilling…
An anchor is a heavy object to hold a vessel in its place or it’s someone that delivers you the news on television. It can also be a helpful mental…
Self connection is an ongoing journey. As we change through the years each phase of life has its own effect on how we connect to ourselves. Sometimes we may not…
Chronic pain is maybe not the first thing that comes to mind when you think of the word pain. However, it’s the first thing that comes to mind when anyone…
I love the recognition that humans are never complacent creatures, that we embody different versions of ourselves during different times of our lives. This concept is as equally exciting as…
Worthiness. I am going to be honest with you. This word makes me uncomfortable. Like, to my core. I suffered years of emotional and verbal abuse in my childhood and…
If there’s an upside to the up-side down world we’re living in right now, it’s the slower pace of life. Coronavirus forced us to sit still and stay home. Because…
June 30, 2002, I walked into a random church in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Little did I know that a handsome man would hit on me there and later become my…
Transformation. I can’t even tell you how many times in my life I have worked to change my form, my appearance. How can I alter, modify my body? What do…
Life with adrenal fatigue syndrome means managing stress in a healthy way
Do you often believe that you are not good enough? Do you constantly disappoint and judge yourself? Is blaming yourself for making mistakes and expecting perfection a daily ritual? This…
If my memory is correct, I was put on my first diet around the age of seven. Looking at pictures of myself back then, I see I may have been…
The doctor glanced up at me after examining my daughter and gently explained, “We’re going to go ahead and make an appointment for her at the children’s hospital downtown.” Well,…
These last few months have been disorienting. To gather enough focus to put pen to paper and write down my thoughts has been daunting. The struggle to identify up from…
“We leave something of ourselves behind when we leave a place, we stay there, even though we go away. And there are things in us that we can find again…
The low-carb lifestyle may not be for everyone, but I encourage you to do some research and see if perhaps reducing your sugar and carbohydrate intake would improve your overall…
I love helping people. It makes me feel purposeful and fulfilled. Every time I’ve taken an Enneagram test, I’m a 2. “The Helper.” I want to bring meals to you…
After more than 15 years of working in the fitness industry, I recently walked away from teaching indoor cycling classes. Leaving the fitness industry was one of the most difficult,…
There is nothing wrong with you because you cringe at the thought of being around your family (or someone in your family). And, if you are feeling guilty about it,…
We all, at some point in our lives, have fallen down physically or mentally, ranging from childhood to adulthood. We've collected a treasure chest full of scars from a few…
Writing is a love. A passion. A joy. But it is not always easy. While I immensely enjoy the opportunity to share my heart, to be vulnerable and authentically me,…
"Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage."-Brene Brown Life is filled with so many amazing moments. There is so much to celebrate, so much to be grateful for, so…
Stress. Tension. Anxiety. Busyness. We have too much to do! Too many hats to wear! Too many places to be! We believe life would calm down and the problem would…
I was fourteen years old as I stepped off the school bus. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. I had just experienced deep rejection. Behind me, the voices of former…
All the little moments that get lost when you are busy running the race to achievement. It's within these moments where belonging waits to be found.
Up until fifth grade I felt I had led a positive, normal Midwest life. Although not together, my parents loved me. I had lots of books to keep me happy…
In a New Year’s quest to declutter, my husband and I decided to sell our piano that had been sitting in our house collecting dust for more than a decade.…
There is an old proverb that mentions the idea of you reap what you sow. If you've ever heard this growing up, how did you decern it? When I heard,…
I stepped out of the car and happened to glance down at the ground before landing on my feet. An odd-shaped rock caught my eye. I immediately beheld how the stone…
The Lives of Childless Women I often struggle in celebrating the lives of growing families around me. Counting myself among childless women I feel like an anomaly. Although maybe more…
When grief officially moves in and unpacks her bags, she becomes a part of every breath and every moment whether we like it our not. When she came to visit…
This year I’m turning 40 and I have one intention for the year: to be the healthiest I have ever been. I would venture to guess that when most people…
I often look up at the night sky and feel my home is up there somewhere. I can feel my soul pulling toward the stars and moon, aching to return…
Shattered Dreams Six months ago, our lives became shattered and fractured in one fatal swoop. All of our dreams and our sense of security vanished, leaving nothing but a nasty…
That one small act of stepping away, that you performed in the moment of tremendous courage, has the power to change destinies of the next generations! Broken Promises She was…
The holidays are hard. Driving into work the other day I could barely keep the tears back. I hurt. Life hurts right now. The holidays are a hard season for…
It was a crisp autumn day, down under in the southern hemisphere of New Zealand. Wandering around the city of Auckland, I found myself people-watching while simultaneously soaking up my…
Learn how to be well this winter with these five self-care tips from yoga's sister science, Ayurveda. Also includes basic Ayurceda and dosha types.
All good love stories start the same way...a brain injury and cold noses. Get some hot cocoa and a snugly blanket and let me tell you all about the Christmas…
Dear Friend, I have something to tell you that maybe you didn’t know!I I see you with your head down and tears flowing. I see the discouragement in your eyes.…
"Dear Body, You were never a problem. There is nothing wrong with your size, your curves, your scars, your flaws, your stretch marks or you. It's not your job to…
Last month, my 40th birthday wish came true. I got to tour New York City and see a Broadway show. It was a spectacular and eye opening adventure. Walking through…
Hate has always been a hard topic to discuss. It is usually seen as negative and can be deemed as an unacceptable emotion, making us feel like a bad person…
How to manage PTSD in a healthy and constructive way can feel impossible. There are so many unknown things happening inside our brains that it seems daunting to try and DO anything about it. I hear you. I understand.