My Coffee Pot died today…. well, kind of.  It ALMOST died today…it was a tragedy for about 10 minutes.  Don’t worry…I already had a new one bought in my head.  Should it be a glass or stain less steel carafe?  Should I get a fancy one with all sorts of brewing styles or just a plain ol’ brewer?  I already had the hot water pot on and a couple Vias poured in my cup.  I’m a proper type of caffeine addict. I always have back up.

How it all Went Down

How do I know it almost died? Well first I pushed the brew button and nothing came on.  Nothing…no little light to say “Give me a minute” … and there was no swoosh of the heater starting.  All the signs were there.  So, I did what any good tech person or my husband would tell you to do.  Unplug it and plug it in again.  I did that.  I even put it in a different plug.  I had a mysterious message on the control panel but I didn’t know what it meant. 

 I decided to push all the buttons…seems like a natural response. Again nothing.  I didn’t panic…they always say DON’T PANIC.  Again remember…hot water and VIA.  There will be coffee this morning.

Second, I followed my natural tech instincts again unplugged it and plugged it back in. The clock came back on!  Glory and hallelujah!  I pushed brew…and a little swoosh sound and then…nothing.  I pushed it again…nothing.  I pulled the pot out and put it back in… nothing.  The brew light is on and shining, but nothing.  I shake the machine a little.  I learned that fine tech move from my old aluminum foil on the TV antenna days.  Nope…nothing. 

Remember…hot water and VIA.  No panic is needed.   I pick up my beloved daily caffeine ally.  Wow, it’s light.  Eureka! No water, I didn’t fulfill my nightly duty of filling the water reserve.  As soon as that pot was full, BOOM…a great swoosh came from my pot and the brew was on.  My VIA and hot water were already mixed and ready to go.  Hallelujahs broke out from the mountain tops….in my head.

Coffee and Marriage

My love and devotion to my coffee have nothing on my love and devotion to my husband.  Just as a silly pot can break and cause momentary havoc on my morning, so to can my relationship with my husband break…but I can’t get a new marriage at Target.  

Have I unplugged lately?  Do I sit on my device and work on tech relationships rather than focus on the one that is here, now, and present?  Somedays I rather work on my “friendships” on Facebook and Instagram or start a new board on Pinterest.  It is so much easier and less complicated to live in a land where I can carefully curate my life and quickly unlike or block a person.  Marriages and real people are messy and well…REAL.  Hard questions, hard truths, and messy conversations are needed.

Have I pushed all the buttons and asked how my spouse is? What about really investigated what is going on in his life?  Have I spoken love in all his languages lately? What have I done to further this relationship?

Made for Relationship

These are all difficult questions to ask of ourselves because we live so much in our own head that we often forget to reflect on the perspective of our spouse.  I am so guilty of this and have a tendency to believe that I am always the righteous one…I know what is correct for our family and only my perspective matters.  That’s an awful view, once I admit it.  Not only am I not always correct, but God made my relationship to work for two people. Obviously, God did not give me all the wisdom and all the knowledge for our circumstances. He made us for relationship and community.  Jesus needed others so obviously so do I. 

Have I put enough water in my marriage?  Am I letting it dry up with routine?  Are we in a rut?  Isn’t life so much easier when you know exactly the next steps you are going to take?  Before even asking him, I love that I can predict exactly what my Dan is going to say. And after 27 years of togetherness, I’m usually right…but shouldn’t I ask anyway?  I frequently change or modify my opinions…it’s called growth and maturity.  I’ve come through a lot of dumb phases in my life and grown past them.  And so, has my main love.  I need to remember that this marriage…this lifetime partnership takes two. 

A Great Pot of Coffee

My coffee pot did not die today; I just need to remember the water every night.  That’s easy. My love for my husband can be a little more complicated and a little more difficult to keep flowing some days.  I need to keep watering it with my heart, attention, and affection to make sure that when our buttons are pushed and life gets too hot, we have the ingredients for a great pot of coffee to drink from.