I write a lot about how the beauty of giving is a gift itself, literally and figuratively. What about boundaries or cut-off points to your extended hand? If you do, how do you feel about the boundaries that you have in place? How are they reciprocated with anger or respect?
The beauty of giving of ourselves through service means planting good seeds that will grow and return to you. There is beauty in recognizing a real need and giving of your time towards the progress or solution of a cause. A cause can be a person, place, thing, or any situation that needs attention for the betterment of life.
Do You Have Limits?
Although the beauty of giving is great, what’s your limit to giving though? When you notice that someone calls on you often for things that you’ll have to struggle to get, you need to have limits. Especially if they are willing to take such risks and sacrifices for them to obtain what they need. Specifically, if you have children, in an older age range, single, or require physical assistance. Now I’m all about love and helping, but when it becomes a risk to your health and livelihood a cut-off point is vital. Being someone who has children, I do my best in teaching balance. I teach and show them how good giving is, the importance of boundaries; and recognizing progress in what you’re giving to. What does it cost you?
Does it cost you your time, your money? Is it emotionally draining? Does it make your life better? Personally, I’ve learned to set boundaries around refusals of suggestions, guaranteed to be beneficial resources. Refusing to take action on suggestions that’ll provide a solution and a means of relief for the giver is my limit. Along with the person never being there when you need some help. The Beauty of giving is that you are handing someone something unattainable for them at the moment. But you must have limits.
Giving is not always beautiful.
The reason for setting boundaries and limits to giving is a protection for us. If you don’t, it will feel like the whole world is in your lap and you can’t carry the weight. Unfortunately, sometimes you just don’t know if the need is legit and you might get played. Shoot, you might have needed that money, or whatever it is that you actually needed but you gave it away. Because it’s the right thing to do right? You know what? You did do the right thing.
The Universal Law of Attraction proves it’ll come back to you because of your intention and attitude when you gave. Note that, once you set boundaries so you don’t get played, reactions will be intense with anger and fault. That’s why giving may not always be beautiful. It’s not your fault someone is angry because you said no to struggling while they benefit off you (all while turning away from you). If you don’t set boundaries and limits you may start to have hard feelings towards somebody and yourself for letting it happen.
You may even start to have feelings of guilt because you refused to help somebody. some people experience nervousness or anxiety when people are constantly on them for favors. Outrageous favors laced with anger. As though their display of anger will force you to give them what they want. Your view of giving can go from positive to negative. Don’t hold hard feelings within yourself for saying no and thinking of your health. Some kind-hearted people have lost everything due to giving without boundaries.
Back to the beauty of giving.
Giving yourself the peace and freedom of saying no to someone constantly trying to use you is beautiful. Getting back to see the beauty of giving and setting limits is the goal. Taking your power back from allowing someone’s anger towards your limits is beautiful. This is how you get your power back. Remove yourself from their attention and take your attention away from them. If they don’t have your attention, they can’t keep your thoughts focused on them.
As I always say, “it all starts with our thoughts we hold over ourselves. Transform your mind and condition it to a new way of thinking if you want to stand up in your thoughts and focus. The Master Key System brings out that we don’t get the way we are overnight. And we got that way by our own thinking. This means then changing how we think and treat ourselves isn’t an overnight process either. It will be a process that takes courage, patience, and love.
What about those who tried to “play you?” Hope for them what you hope for yourself. Hope that they find what they are missing in life and you will continue to grow and prosper in your life. The beauty of giving allows someone who is watching to match your energy in their life. And can find the beauty of giving while setting limits.
Other helpful articles on self care: How to Mentally and Physically Practice Self Care